I posted Pastor James MacDonald’s “Weekly Walk”, Strength in Weakness, from December 28, 2009 in my last entry. It poignantly reminded me of how the Lord has carried me in His mighty strength these many years.
Although more years have passed now, I have said many times in my own testimony that “the last decade has been the worst years of my life - and yet they have been the very best years of my life.”
I have said that in my own painful tragedy I would literally be hiding in my closet to this very day.
But because of the Lord - He has given me not only the strength to do next things but a desire to do them. In these years I have seen God’s hand in my suffering as He has lifted me up. I have felt His peace even in the chaos, and I have been able to rest in Him even in this horrendous storm that seemingly has no end. I have discovered that the Lord truly does love me, not only because His Word says so but because I have seen it.
Yes, these years have been the worst of my life - but really, they have been the very best. I have drawn near to God and He has drawn near to me. This is the very best place to be.
“Submit therefore to God. Resist the devil and he will flee from you. Draw near to God and He will draw near to you.” James 4:7-8a
This may sound so very strange to some of you, but if I had known of this tragedy before it had happened, if I had known that these chaotic years would have dragged on for so very long, if I had known of the agony we would carry with us every day - I would have “run away” as Jonah had before the storm; but then I would have missed these very precious years of truly getting to know my God and Savior. I would have missed how He has used my pain to mature me in Him. Yes, because of my Lord these years have been my very best.
Praising You, my Comforter and Counselor - my strength!
"But as for me, the nearness of God is my good; I have made the Lord God my refuge, that I may tell of all Your works." Psalm 73:28