“….yet not one of them will fall to the ground apart from the will of your Father."
Almost a decade ago when our agony was new and so very raw, I sat in a soybean field all alone. It was the weekend so all of the construction noise which filled the air during the week was gone. It was completely silent. We were the only ones at that time living out in this field far from even the sounds of the highways; the only patch of green in acres of soil. I could see the farms in the distance, but I could not see any people as I sat on the deck and I cried out to God for help. Although I was not alone because He was with me, I felt so alone, and so forgotten.
He knew my agony; He was not wringing His hands in shock and fear. Even so, I needed to share it all with Him again and thus draw nearer to Him; oh, so much nearer to Him so I would grow to trust Him more in all these things.
Words and tears fell freely and then finally with nothing else to share with Him, I just pictured myself at His feet as His wounded daughter and rested with Him in the wind of the fields.
As I sat there I finally began to notice and hear ~~~ I heard the birds. The only trees nearby were on the faraway farms, but I could hear the birds chit-chittering as if they were close by. I could not see them, but I heard them. It was then that I remembered Matthew 10:29-31. God knows even when a sparrow falls, and so, He knew my suffering. I had felt alone and forgotten when I began to cry out to God that afternoon. He heard my cries before I uttered them, He knew my sorrows, He knew my agony, and He met me there, all alone in that field with the birds I could not see. I was not forgotten by Him. He had reminded me that I am more valuable than many sparrows.
“..the very hairs of your head are all numbered. So do not fear; you are more valuable than many sparrows.”
Wounded sister, do you feel forgotten and alone in your sorrows? You know He is with you. Cry out to Him and tell Him all of your pain. If you are angry with Him, then tell Him --- He already knows how you feel, so be honest. You may feel He has abandoned you, but you know the truth; He never leaves nor forsakes, so repent for blaming Him as you finish. He will surround you with His love, and even if your circumstances never change, He will carry you through this dark valley you are in. As His wounded daughter, He can use you in ways you have never dreamed possible if you lay at His feet.
"And we know that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to his purpose."