I know what it is to be so very, very hurt. It is easy to be angry at certain people and also everyone else----and sinfully angry at God for not stopping it or saving you out of this pain. I also I know what it is like to be jealous or even worse----the feelings of hatred because people have what you desire because it was truly yours before it was stolen.
I recently heard a Christian radio lesson in which I am so thankful. The message dealt with this very issue (jealousy, anger, hatred in the situation of being wrongly slighted to whatever degree).
These are two parts which I remember:
1) Comparing ourselves to others: Read John 21. Peter was at the beach with our resurrected Jesus. In verses 18-22 Jesus has just finished asking Peter if he loves Him. Jesus then tells Peter pretty much what will happen and even how eventually he will die. Peter begins comparing himself to John. "What about that guy?" Peter wanted to know if John was going to have the same thing happen.
(After all it won't be fair-----I can certainly see myself asking this question)
Jesus' answer is profound, "If I want him to remain until I come, what is that to you? You follow Me!" John 21:22
In other words~~~~it isn't any of our business.
We know that John did not remain on earth until Jesus' second return. But this wasn't the point. The point was that it wasn't Peter's job to know about John's future and to compare himself to John. Peter's job was to FOLLOW JESUS.
And this is our job: to follow Jesus.
Life has not been fair to most of us, but our job remains the same----to FOLLOW JESUS. Thankfully, we are not the same as other people, and so we should never compare ourselves to others no matter what the circumstances or no matter how difficult it is for us to control our thoughts.
To follow Jesus we need to keep our eyes on Him (PRAY and READ HIS WORD ) and do what He wants us to do no matter what anyone else has of ours or does to us.
2) Capturing our thoughts: God doesn't want us to be going down wrong roads of thinking, especially if these thoughts are feeding our desire to hate, become more jealous and go deeper into anger. If we do not stop ourselves now when the pain is so very great--------then when we are finally blessed with a solution from the LORD, we will just continue with that ugly sin cropping up EVEN when we finally get the blessing of what we have really desired. This ugly sin will overshadow our joy in some way----because we will have fed this sin over time, practicing it so very often that it has become an incredibly ugly habit.
Let's choose not do this any more.
"Each heart knows its own bitterness, and no one else can share its joy."
"See to it that no one misses the grace of God and that no bitter root grows up to cause trouble and defile many."
".....taking every thought captive to the obedience of Christ."
2 Corinthians 10:5
As handmaidens of the Lord Jesus Christ, you have the Holy Spirit in you to help you choose the right response to whatever happens in your life. Some of our hurts are true agonies, and it will not be an easy road for us to choose rightly because the pain is so great~~the loss is so profound, but your efforts with the Spirit will glorify God when you begin to capture your thoughts and Follow Jesus.
May you see the incredible blessings as you choose rightly.