For Keeps and Everything

“Wives, be subject to your own husbands, as to the Lord.  For the husband is the head of the wife, as Christ also is head of the church, He Himself being the Savior of the body."  Ephesians 5:22-23

“Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself up for her, so that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, that he might present to Himself the church in all her glory, having no spot or wrinkle or any such thing;  but that she would be holy and blameless.  So husbands ought to also love their own wives as their bodies.”  Ephesians 5:25-28

“For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and shall be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.”  Genesis 2:24, Ephesians 5:31

“Nevertheless, each individual among you also is to love his own wife even as himself, and the wife must see to it that she respects her husband.”  Ephesians 5:33

From his book, Shepherding God’s Flock: A Handbook on Pastoral Ministry, Counseling, and Leadership, Jay E. Adams explains on pages 247-248 beginning with the “Problem Session”:

1) Future Family Relationships:

Not only should the pastor emphasize the need to make a break with the counselees’ parental homes, but he must be careful to note that one of the principal reasons for the break is that marriage brings into being a new decision-making unit that is directly responsible to God, and that in this unit the husband and wife are responsible also to put each other first before any other human beings.

Again, it will be important to show the need for this break with former parental authority to be a clean break, Christian in every way. Frequently marriages begin with clouds hanging heavily over the young couple because the break with one or both of the families was not effected properly. This must not be so. Any marriage today has enough other pressures exerted upon it that it can ill afford to have to bear up under these strong emotional strains as well. Therefore, the pastor should probe carefully and fully to be sure that all difficulties or conflicts with parents may be uncovered and resolved before the wedding.”

Must I say any more?  As Christians we should be the first to behave rightly when letting go of our adult children, especially as they marry.  It is a detriment for the young couples who must live under such bondage as parental control.  What joy for them to create a new decision-making unit before God and to put each other first!

Marriage is for keeps and everything.  Let us choose to live rightly in our own marriage and encourage our children to choose this also.