from Stan* at Winging It where you can read his post in its entirety.
Read Ephesians 5:25-30
..."Husbands, love your wives." Absolutely essential.
Fail at that and you fail at marital fidelity.
Now keep in mind it is agape love which doesn't love with return in view. Indeed, isn't that what Paul said? "As Christ loved the church." That is, "while we were yet sinners (read "hostile to God") Christ died for us." It is a "gave Himself up for her" love. It is a love that includes cleansing her "by the washing of water with the word".
Is your wife, because of your ministry to her, "holy and blameless"? It's part of your marriage conditions. It is an "as you love your own body" love. You nourish and cherish it.
Do you nourish and cherish her?
This isn't "the optimum marriage". It is part of the basic qualities and conditions of marriage to which all faithful husbands are required to conform...
1 Peter 3:7
You husbands likewise, live with your wives in an understanding way, as with a weaker vessel, since she is a woman; and grant her honor as a fellow heir of the grace of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered.
...husbands ought to be students of their wives.
No one should understand your wife, husband, better than you do because that is part and parcel of what is expected of you in marriage.
Husbands are required by God to be the head of the house (1 Cor 11:3), but not as lord and master. No, she is to be treated with honor, like fine china. Notice that it does not say that she is a weaker vessel, but that you must treat her as such.
Note, also, that this particular condition of marriage carries with it a severe warning: "That your prayers may not be hindered."
Having trouble praying?
Is it because you are not a faithful husband in this regard? ...
...Marital fidelity is much, much bigger than not cheating on your spouse.
Jesus took the first obvious step in that direction by assuring us that lusting after another woman was adultery.
You may classify yourself as sexually faithful, but if you lust after another, you'd be fooling yourself.
But beyond that, fidelity includes all aspects of marriage. It includes the basic unity that defines marriage (Gen 2:24; Matt 19:4-6).
It includes leaving and cleaving.
It includes husbands loving their wives in a sacrificial, selfless way.
It includes honoring your wife and understanding your wife.
It includes being the leader in the home which itself involves being the spiritual leader and the primary teacher.
And there is the whole aspect of sexual fidelity that views her sexual needs as more important than your own. All of this is part of marital fidelity, men.
How are you measuring up?
*
*Note my last blog post on Fidelity by Stan and my next one on The Faithful Wife.
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